it's 4:37 AM right now. And i've been awake for the last 2 hours.
damn what's wrong with my sleeping pattern these days?

i feel like blaming someone

i feel the need to blame someone. i notice that almost everyday i get pissed at 6th period because of math and because of this person. i don't know what the hell happened but i feel like the person is using me. idk what to do i'm just waiting for spring break to come so i can be free from this internal shit i've been dealing with lately. and when spring break comes, i'll be waiting for summer.

i want this school year to end right now.

omegle

talking to random strangers online is fun. you get to make up crap about yourself, TAHAHAHAA.

frustrated

today's fifth and sixth periods were not good today. freaking ellipses and hyperbolas pissed me off to the point where i wanted to scream out and strangle the next person i see. hell, i'm supposed to be doing my math homework but i decided not to and go on with euro homework. these days i've been being a bitch to only my sister so i feel bad. i'm sorry for being a bitch emma, i did not mean it, you just caught me during bad moments.

one more week until spring break. i cannot wait.
five more weeks until ap exam. i can wait.

even if the sky is falling down

because really, that's immature

to those who are egging me to confess to the guy i like --

stop it.

it's pissing me off how all of you threaten to tell him yourselves if i don't. come on now, let's not be immature, yes? please. i'll tell him myself when i want to. the reason i haven't confessed when i said i would is because of peer pressure. shit guys, stop it. just stop.

happy 16th ellen

i know that you had a good one cause i was there. today at 6flags was mucho fun, i'm glad that you invited me. <3

i don't know what to do

i know that i'm being replaced. that feeling of unwanted is overwhelming and i see myself analyzing what to do around this girl who used to be very close with me. i've started becoming more quiet and trying to find conversation starters but when i actually initiate the convo, it gets awkward. i try my best not to make it awkward but it does and i just keep to myself. and i haven't been being a good friend to her, so i understand why but i'm trying to save everything.
lets call the girl A. and the girl i'm being replaced with B. so before i met A during my middle school years, she's known B first and they were close then. but as middle school ended and high school started, A and i became close. but now that sophomore year's a few months away from summer, A has been hanging with B. at first i brushed it off but A was always looking for B, talking to B, and hanging with B. yeah call me jealous because i miss talking about weird things with A.
i sound possessive but i'm not. crap, i sound like an overemotional preteen but really, i don't know what to do anymore.

full weekends

the weekend schedule's packed. all day saturday i'm going somewhere and sunday after church i have basketball practice. playing basketball with my church is so freaking fun and hilarious, i swear. it's the only thing i'm looking forward to besides reuniting with the sailor moon's. except for this annoying kid who keeps on following us around at church. just gtfo.

under pressure

i need to step up and walk the walk. i keep on saying that 'oh i'll confess this friday blah blah blah' but when friday comes, i don't. see that's the thing with me, i don't do what i say i'll do. i keep on saying 'oh this time it's for reals' but actually no. i hate that about me.

anyways i'm hungry and pissed off. parents went to la, there's no food in the house for dinner, and i'm broke. fuck thissssssss

i don't care

i have a f in euro and a d in chem. fuck this shit.